Mid-CenturyModernMoms

Dreams - from mother and daughter

Chuck thought my dream had a simple interpretation: I've been typing too much. I went to bed with a sore thumb. La Petite agreed. They may be right. I do have arthritic symptoms in my right thumb, and my left is catching up. I have a splint for the right wrist and thumb; I wear it at night to immobilize both and ease the pain somewhat.

So here's the dream.

I was in the emergency room - again. Same doctor, same staff, all recognized us from our back to back visits in early winter. This time, I was there because I'd dislocated my left thumb. Is that even possible? In my dream, the thumb had already been set, back in place, and the pain and swelling were gradually easing. Even so, it still hurt like the blazes. Dr. S had decided that I needed a cortisone shot in the joint. Disclaimer; I have no medical background and have no idea what would really be done at this point. It was a dream, remember? I've had many cortisone shots in my foot, so I know that they are very painful, but also very effective. I think the discussion went something like this.

Dr. S: Have you ever had a cortisone injection before?

Me: silent nod.

Dr. S: So you know what it feels like?

Me: silent nod

Dr. S: Okay, here goes.

Me: turn head, find focal point, breathe.

Chuck thinks it's as simple as going to bed with a sore thumb after being on the computer too much that day. He may be right. The other interpretations could be a little more complex.

• Why was I completely unable to answer the doctor? I'm a verbal-linguistic person; words are my strength. I'm rarely intimidated by medical people. Was my silence significant?
• The repeat visit to the ER - likely a flashback to the last one, when I opted not to be admitted to the hospital overnight and went to school to leave sub plans instead. Bad choice; I'll never do that again. At least in my dream I followed the doctor's instructions, no matter how painful.
• Then again, there's that sore thumb. I'm relearning how to handle a keyboard and mouse in less painful ways, and I'm learning to limit the time I spend on the computer and prioritize that time more effectively.

Readers, chime in. What do you think of my dream? Simple, just a result of a sore thumb joint, or a deeper, more complicated meaning? 

Now for the daughter. Hers was a bit more entertaining. We've traced the sources already; no need to interpret. Just enjoy. 

The dream:

The service crew, the techs from AT&T UVerse, had arrived at our home to finally replace the lines that stretch across the backyard. These lines have been nibble by squirrels, hit by lightning, and tangled around growing trees. We've been waiting a long time and we were so thrilled they turned up! 

The techs replacing the line were (are you ready for this?) the Backstreet Boys. 

The talented boy band members demonstrated their other skill by replacing the line successfully. When they were done, they climbed into their service van and drove away, singing. 

Now here's the question: what were they singing? My contribution is this: "I am a lineman for the county." Come on, readers, let's hear it. 

ah...freedom

No, you never stop being a parent....but parenting college students is a very different world than parenting younger children.

the Oscar nominations were announced today, and I've seen 5 of the 10 films that were nominated for Best Picture.

My  coworker has seen only one of the films --Toy Story 3. Seems her 3 year old is obsessed with all things Toy Story.  Generally speaking, she and her husband don't go out alone very often -- an event or movie must be deemed "babysitter worthy" before they will choose to go.

That was me just a few years ago.    Sometimes I miss those days.

I'm really enjoying the freedom I have now.

but I'm also looking forward to the time when Jen and Becca have kids of their own, and when something is deemed "baby sitter worthy" they call on Grandma to take care of the little ones.

cross posted at Songbird's Crazy World

comings and goings

So yesterday was the first day of class at Becca's school.  Her second semester of college!  She spent most of Monday packing up her things -- most of which she never unpacked when she came home in December.  and, of course, she and I went shopping for groceries on Sunday because "the food in the cafeteria is awful."  And we made a quick stop at Barnes & Noble -- she's her mother's daughter, she loves to read for pleasure.  And my sister cooked, of course -- Becca went back to school with  home made matzo ball soup, pot roast and brownies.  And you know she hit me up for $$$ before she left for the dorm. 

 

One of the biggest lessons Becca is learning isn't in a classroom, it's in the dorm.  Her dorm is set up as apartments that can accomodate 4-6 students.  Her apartment is set up for 6 -- it's got 3 bedrooms and 2 bathrooms as well as a living room and a kitchen.  There are actually 7 girls living there (there would have been 8, but one girl dropped out the first week.)  The girls are learning to live with each other, and sometimes there are stressful situations -- conflicts about doing the dishes and cleaning up the common areas, buying supplies, when to be quiet so others can study -- typical college roommate stuff.  She's not happy, but she's learning to deal with it.  She tells me that overall she gets along with all of the girls -- except one.  Apparently the young lady doesn't have a concept of "private property" -- she's gone into Becca's bedroom more than once to "borrow" Becca's things without permission, and Becca now keeps her bedroom door locked when she's not at home.  Becca doesn't mind sharing her pots and pans and dishes, but keep your hands off her clothes!

 

And then there's Jen.  When you have a house off campus and a car of your own, you don't have to worry about when the dorms are open or closed -- you can come and go as you please.  Her spring classes start next Monday, so she's going back to school on Saturday.  But she's already been back to school twice since Christmas -- once for the New Year's Eve party, and again last weekend for her housemate's birthday.

 

I was a little nervous about her being up at school last weekend -- my Jets fan daughter in New England, with a house full of Patriots fans!  Even her boyfriend is a Pats fan...He watched the game with her, and she didn't gloat -- too much -- when the Jets beat the Pats. 

 

The situation kind of reminded her about the Giants' Superbowl victory a few years ago -- Jen and I were driving up to Connecticut during the game because we were planning to check out a college the next day.  Jen's friend Billy kept texting her the whole time we were in the car, giving her details about the game.  She got a text from Billy that the Giants won the game....just as we arrived at our hotel.  When we walked into the hotel lobby, the first thing I noticed was a giant TV...and the long, sad faces of the hotel staff and other guests as they watched the post game show....I almost feared pulling out my NY driver's license....Was that really 3 years ago?

 

Sigh...time is flying by...

cross posted at Songbird's Crazy World

growing pains

So the girls are home for winter break, and the conversations have turned to future plans.  Jen is well on her way to achieving her educational goals, though there have been a few twists and turns along the way.  Becca is trying to find herself right now; she's expressing dissatisfaction with some of her choices and is seeking new direction.

 

And then, of course, there are....boyfriends.  Becca has been involved with someone she's known since high school.  Jen, on the other hand, met someone at college.  Someone who is not from Long Island.  And it occurred to me that if the relationship goes somewhere, there's actually a possibility that my daughter may make her home in some part of the world other than where I live.

 

Each step, each decision, takes them further away from the little girls they used to be....I want them to become strong, confident women, with full and rich lives.

 

But sometimes the growing process really hurts.

 

cross posted at Songbird's Crazy World

New Year, New Opportunities, New Changes

Pushing to the Winter Break is always a challenge at school. The moodiness. The excitement. The full moon and lunar eclipse, concurrent with a snowstorm and other mood-altering atmospheric conditions -- well, I can just say the last week of school in 2010 was more of a challenge than usual.

But I'm done. I survived. It's over.

It's more than over, though. I'm done - for the year. Not just 2010, but the full 2010-2011 school year. I'm taking a leave of absence from my teaching job from now until June.

Illness made teaching tough this year. Gout, flu-like virus, even the possibility of heart trouble had me missing more days than I wanted.

But more than that, school has been a struggle: a struggle that was making me sicker. I didn't sleep well at night. Worries kept me awake, and when sleep did come, I'd awaken in a head to toe sweat. Stomach aches every Monday morning, heartburn and headaches Sunday nights, there were too many symptoms to ignore.

There were tipping points. Getting hurt while preventing a student from throwing a chair. Getting threatened by a student and seeing no administrative response whatsoever. Spending time late at night to leave decent sub plans - against the doctor's advice - only to get all kinds of nasty notes about how my work hadn't been sufficient.

Between me, the doctor, and my family, we decided it was time: time to look into a long-term leave. A time to recover, to heal, both physically and mentally. A time to really examine my commitment to teaching and whether it can weather this kind of conflict. Before I make any kind of decision on my future, I need to rest. Rest, recover, and feel good again -- even on Mondays.

grad school search time, already?

Didn't we just finish the college search?

 

 

Yes, I know we did.

 

But Jen is a junior this year.  And she has definite plans to start her Master's as soon as she graduates from college.   She'll get her BA in May 2012, if all goes as planned, and she should start grad school in September 2012.  She wants to take a program here on Long Island, and there are at least four schools she might consider.

 

So I suggested she spend some time now, while she's on winter break, looking at the schools she'd like to attend, finding out what sort of GPA they require and what entrance exams she needs and when she needs to take those exams.  I know, it's a little early....but she really should have an idea of what she'll need to do next year, when she's a senior and about to graduate. 

cross posted at Songbird's Crazy World