Finding her way, charting her course

By the time you read this, I will be well into my day. Well into my day.

Today I got up long before dawn.

Long before dawn.

I got up before dawn so that I can get to the train station the required half-hour in advance of my 4:45 a.m. train. So that I can arrive at my eldest daughter's city of residence in time for her graduation ceremonies that evening. Train at the crack of dawn and missing two days of work so I can attend her graduation. Her second in two years.

I am the very picture of mother-love, I tell you.

She's graduating as a Registered Massage Therapist and is absolutely bubbling over with plans and ideas. Eventually, a clinic for mothers and small children; pregnancy massage, baby massages. Maybe offer childbirth classes in association? Oh, and how about massage for labour training for husbands/partners? For now, she has some solid leads - a room in a chiropractor's office, with likely some receptionist duties for some source of income as she builds her own clientele.

Exciting stuff. It's hard to describe the mixture of pride, pleasure, fulfillment, satisfaction that comes to a mother when her child is grappling with life with such focus, enthusiasm, creativity, determination and passion. This is what parenting's all about, isn't it? Seeing your children launched into life?

She wasn't so filled with enthusiasm and passion 20 months ago, when she graduated from university with a four-year BA in Anthropology. While she had loved her studies, and thoroughly enjoyed the subject itself, as the terms rolled by she became more and more convinced that she didn't actually want to be an anthropologist... In her final two terms, facing the inevitable job-hunt, she had a true crisis. She was nearing the end of this section of her life's path, and beyond?

Nothing compelling. Nothing beckoned her. Nothing resonated with her. Instead of a fork in the road -- Your FUTURE! This way!! -- she was nearing what felt, to her, like a dead end.

I didn't know the extent of the wrestling that was happening until I got the phone call in March of her graduating year. She had just about finished her university career, only one or two more exams to go. The phone call in which she informed me that no, she didn't want to go into an anthropology-related career. What she really wanted...

I could hear the tentative note in her voice.

... what she really wanted was to be a massage therapist. Really. And the course began in just a few weeks. The course from which she is now graduating. (If you're curious to know how good old mom responded to that phone call, you can read about it here.)

So. Those first four years. Were they time wasted? Money wasted? Not to me. They were time and money invested in a young woman's self-discovery. She still has all that knowledge and experience in her head, her memory, her life. Education is not all about the job.

Still, I was not planning on going to this graduation. Two days off work, crack-of-dawn train, the expense of the ticket. I'd gone to the first, the four-year degree; I was going to beg off the second, 18-month diploma/accreditation. I felt some guilt about this, but not enough to make me go.

And then I got the phone call.

"Guess WHAT?"

She'd been named class valedictorian. It's a two-part vote: both the instructors and the students have a say in the choice.

Well. How could I not go, after that? It's not guilt motivating me, not at all, it's pride. The desire to share something this special with my child. And somehow it seems fitting. She did well in university. Her degree was achieved with a more-than-respectable grade point average. But it's this course, the career that calls her, the one that has her passion, which granted her -- in which she earned -- this distinction.

She graduates on Thursday evening. We'll spend Friday together. And on Saturday? Saturday she moves into the big, grown-up world of Starting Your Career.

And she can hardly wait.

Comments

[amyz5]

i feel so proud of not only her but you. education for education sake topped off with a career path that she loves. that sounds win win to me. congrats.

[Daisy]

Motherly pride is a beautiful thing! I, too, took a while to find my niche. I'm glad I was able to take the winding road to my career. It sounds like your daughter found her way!