Hello. I'm suburbancorrespondent and I'm the mother of 2 teens. I also have 4 younger ones, thanks be to God, or I would have run away from home by now. Margalit invited me to add my 2 cents to this blog - even though she said she was looking for people who have good relationships with their teenagers. Apparently, she hasn't read my blog very closely. Living with a teenage girl who has decided she no longer wants anything to do with you feels like the 7th grade lunchroom all over again. Avoid eye contact. Don't confront unless absolutely necessary. And for heaven's sake, don't breathe near her unless you want to feel the cloud of disgust that emanates from her person like a cloud of napalm.
Why, no, I'm not having a lot of fun right now. Why do you ask?
If you're one of those persons who just loooves teens, you may want to move right along to some other person's blog post. I enjoyed mine, too, until they turned on me. Give me little kids any day - at least, when they throw a tantrum, you can pick them up and put them in their rooms. But when my 14-year-old daughter Anna throws a tantrum? I have to gather all the younger children and leave the house.
This doesn't happen with all teens, mind you - my son Theo is 16 and he doesn't throw tantrums. He's polite and helpful around the house. (I'm telling you this in case you think my husband and I are just total losers as parents.) But you can tell we bore him. He's trying to finish both junior and senior year in the next 12 months, just so he can get out of the house. Nothing personal, or anything, I know - but it still makes me feel about as attractive as a week-old tuna sandwich.
Let's face it - the teens just don't get excited about the little things anymore. The popsicles, the walks to the park, the homemade playdough - not only are they not excited by them (and, really, I don't expect them to be); but they are anxious to put as much distance between themselves and those who enjoy such innocent activities (that would be, um, me) as possible.
So, if you come here on Sundays expecting me to wax rhapsodic over my adolescents, you're bound to be disappointed. Any time I spend thinking about them is usually spent devising ways to make their lives as miserable as they make mine. Revenge is always sweet.
Popsicle, anyone?
Welcome. I have a match for your Anna with my Rosie. Although, every once in a while, she'll get very affectionate and come over with some surprise hugs. Lately, she's been reading in my bed with me at night before she (or I) go to sleep. And you might want to look at Tuesday's post about dealing with this age.
Posted by: Iris | June 01, 2008 at 07:56 PM
Love it! I look to you for advice on my up and coming teens!
Posted by: Dawn | June 01, 2008 at 10:09 PM
As always, it's so nice to know that I'm not alone in this teen rearing business. Or doing something so very wrong. Or if I am, there are others like me out there. Thanks for that.
Posted by: Karen | June 01, 2008 at 11:42 PM
Yes! I'm not the only one in pain from my teens. Welcome SC, Welcome!
Posted by: JaniceNW | June 02, 2008 at 12:36 AM
I can vaguely remember how it's like to be a teenager, but one thing's certain I know that I didn't really give my mom a hard time, errr...not that I know of.
My son's only 18 months old, so I don't know what to expect from him yet.
Posted by: Yvie | June 02, 2008 at 04:11 AM
Hmm and I wonder why my sister and I were at boarding school? ;o)
Welcome SC!!
Posted by: Penelope | June 02, 2008 at 03:16 PM
My one and only is a soon to be 11-yr old girl so I'm looking for any and all advice on how to deal with this age. I've had a few sneak previews of what is to come and boy am I scared!
Posted by: Susan | June 02, 2008 at 03:36 PM
My mother smirks whenever my kids give me grief. She thinks I don't notice. Hm, does that mean I was a difficult teen? No, don't answer that!
Posted by: Daisy | June 02, 2008 at 05:06 PM
i am glad we did not give up on having our 3rd child. even though she is 7 years younger than #2, she is soo good for my self esteem. the teenagers can treat me like i'm dumber than a post but my youngest still tells me i'm the greatest mom ever! i have hopes that the older kids will start to realize i'm smarter than they thought about the time #3 hits her teen years. i may survive this parent thing with ego in tact. :)
Posted by: lmc | June 02, 2008 at 10:00 PM
Wow! I knew I wasn't alone out there. I thought about starting a blog called Worst Mom Ever, cause that's what I feel like with my teens. If I haven't pissed one of them off by the end of each day, I feel like I might have missed something :-) Today's a particularly good day -- 2 out of 3 aren't speaking to me. Is it wrong to get this much satisfaction from out-bitching your teen daughters?
Posted by: Trina | June 02, 2008 at 11:03 PM
Wow! I knew I wasn't alone out there. I thought about starting a blog called Worst Mom Ever, cause that's what I feel like with my teens. If I haven't pissed one of them off by the end of each day, I feel like I might have missed something :-) Today's a particularly good day -- 2 out of 3 aren't speaking to me. Is it wrong to get this much satisfaction from out-bitching your teen daughters?
Posted by: Trina | June 02, 2008 at 11:04 PM
Trina - I hope it's not wrong, because I feel the same way.
lmc - Yes, having the younger one around helps - I don't know what I would have done last year without my sweet toddler to hug.
susan - Don't worry - not all the girls go totally nuts. They just get more moody and slightly irrational. Mine just went off the deep end.
Posted by: suburbancorrespondent | June 03, 2008 at 06:38 AM
You speak the truth. It is possible to make them happy, but it generally requires large amounts of cash (or credit).
Posted by: Jenn @ Juggling Life | June 06, 2008 at 01:08 AM