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April 17, 2008


I hear ya sister!! This is why I was a SAHM for 20 years!!. I tried a couple of part-time jobs, but somehow the kids managed to come up with after school needs that couldn't be met unless I was available - I suffered coaches, theater directors and other good hearted adults who gave up their time to coach, direct, supervise, but had a lousy sense of time . Wrestling practice ( daughter!) will end at 5:30 - I bust a gut getting from work in time, only for DD to stagger out at 6:15pm! The soccer team will return from the game at 7pm - I'm still at work when I get a call - game called off, can you get me NOW!! I lost count of the play rehearsals that were scheduled 1 day in advance ( we need to go over the orphans/frogs/townsfolk routine)
The day they got their licenses I cheered, although DD still couldn't drive to school until this year as the school has limited parking, and she was a June baby! But at least last year she was able to get rides from her older friends home!
And then, when you are finally free, two things happen - the insurance bill comes, causing mild heart failure, and you have to sit home and worry that they are OK, and not looking a flashing lights! Oh, and here in Massachusetts you can add the terror that is teen driver getting a speeding ticket - they lose their licence and have to re do their driving test/traffic school!!
FYI - it does get better - I am one month in to my first full time job in 21 years, and so far everything is going smoothly, although DD bedroom is a no go area until she gets time to clean it herself!!

When they get their drivers' licenses, it's both a blessing and a curse. That is, if there's a spare vehicle available! Somehow, at this age, bikes don't cut it any more.

Honestly, I haven't the slightest idea how moms who work full-time can figure out these schedules. Or moms with a lot of kids. My friend who has five literally lived in the car from after school till 10 pm. I don't think they had one meal at home in the three years she lived next door to me...
And yes, that driver's license thing is such a double-edged sword...if only bikes were the solution ;-)

Oh, my, Jenny, I'm laughing so hard--and wishing I lived nearby so I could help out. I'm a few years removed from all of this--and we do live close enough to schools/kids' jobs/the pool/etc. so my kids could walk if they HAD to. But, this took me back to some of the craziness. I say, go and don't look back. They'll survive somehow.

You need a drink.

Pack your suitcase and RUN! You've done your best and no matter what you else you do now they're not going to be happy with you! It's a rule that as soon as you get those schedules worked out and take off something will change and you will be blamed. So, enjoy your time away!

Oh my . . . I'm like Judy, laughing and shaking my head. I just have one left at home - Youngest Son is 17 and has a license and his own vehicle, so we pretty much never have to take him anywhere unless it's somewhere I don't feel safe letting him drive yet (i.e. the airport, where I am driving him this afternoon to leave on a school orchestra trip to Disney World). I need a happy hour just from reading this post . . .

Oy, I'm exhausted just reading this, but I'm right there with ya girl, spreadsheets and all. One son with no wheels, many activities and a reluctance to ask friends for rides...which is fine because they're all new drivers. My job about 20 miles away from his school. I drive mornings but can't do afternoons. Father does afternoons, but is likely to move to another state next year. Don't know precisely what we'll do, but somehow we'll figure it out.

I'm glad to know I'm not the only one dealing with this on a daily basis!

Oh. My. God.

My kids are just going to have to get redistricted to a school near enough for them to walk like I did, because I can not be doing with all that. I would lose two children in the first week! You could mobilize an army!

My head hurts now.

I need a spreadsheet version, please. OMG. My kids aren't getting older. I just won't allow it.

Do you live near those housewives of NY or Orange county with all those fiances who have been married to two other neighbors? Sounds like your next book is writing itself here...

P really hates driving the kids around--but their school is teeny-tiny and has no bus, so off we go every morning. I confess that we have steered clear of travel teams. We're pathetically unathletic, though there is piano, voice, martial arts, golf and Upward basketball to deal with. I refuse to do Cub Scouts because you have to donate life and a lung and I'm way too selfish.

You and your husband are saints and while I smiled at your wonderful, breathless description of your dilemmas, I know it's really hard. I've started having my parents come to the house when I go out of town. They're awfully sweet and handy now that they're retired.

Did I mention that Pom's boyfriend drives?! She'll get her license here in the next couple weeks, though I really think sixteen is too young. But it will be awfully nice to have her take Bengal to school with her!

I saw your book today at B&N and it made me smile!

Oh wow...I'm in awe. I just have two and i have had mean, ungrateful thoughts in recent weeks along the lines of "why did I think it was a good idea to have them in the first place" and "how important can these so-called extracurricular activities *really* be?" and "wouldn't it be a great test of their independence if I just....left for a few days?"

I knew I had crossed a line somewhere when I made my husband go look at a house for sale...right across from the high school. Imagine - no more driving for school, activities...and they could cut their own hair... :)

You realize that your next job, Air Traffic Controller, will be a breeze, right? Oy really, I do Outlook charts and excel checklists everytime I have to step out of the house for longer than a day. What would they do without us? ~:)
Hope you had a GREAT TIME!

My husband and I have eight kids between the two of us.


When they got be be teens, (and particularly when they started signing THEMSELVES up for activities, often without consulting us) we let them know that getting to and from their many, many, many, many activities was *their* responsibility. They bike, they take the bus, they walk (a couple of miles each way is not unheard of), they arrange their own car-pools and shared rides.

Last summer, we got rid of our car. Which put the absolute final nail in the "can-you-drive-me" coffin.


Ilona--you're a hard-liner! But it's made your life way easier I bet!
Oh Suz, air traffic controller would be perfect for my ADD/multi-tasking self! and I bet it pays better than writing!
Thanks everyone for the comments (was out of town so not able to respond in kind!)

I lost you with the first play practice. Can't do it without flow charts.

As for my nine, I prefer to write about the ride nightmare after the fact. (Pardon me for pasting a link:

I trust they all made it to and from and safely?

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