Last week was an exercise in Mom loosening the strings tieing down Abe. He's 19 yo now, but he's my special needs baby and I worry that he doesn't have the skills to compete out in the big bad world.
Last week was school vacation week, but Mom had to work (of course). But there were some things that Abe needed to do during that time. So instead of me running myself ragged or burning vacation time, I let him (made him?) go to some appointments by himself.
The first was his yearly physical. His doctor is at a big hospital and I didn't want him driving down there in hte traffic mess of Marathon Monday in Massachusetts. So I printed out directions of how he should walk to the trolley line and then what transfers he needed to do to get to the hospital, and tell him when he needed to leave. I did ask him if he wanted me to meet him there, but he said no. You think that giving him explicit directions on how to go to someplace that he had never gotten to by himself before was too much? Abe didn't think so. If I hadn't given him the directions, he probably wouldn't have even set off on the journey.
The only glitch in the process was that he didn't know the co-pay amount, and for some reason neither did the secretary checking him in; so they'll bill me.
Then there was the "Accepted Students Day" at MB Community College, where he is going to attend next year. There was a program for all of the students that the school had accepted (and probably hadn't accepted back) to introduce them to the facilities, etc. I was in the second day of an all day meeting, so I couldn't go with him (parents were invited). This being the first time that he drove to the school, I once again got him directions and gave him the timing that he needed to get there on time. But that was it. And he had a good time there and now is more comfortable with the idea of attending any college. He came away with a rough knowledge of the building and a sense that this wasn't going to be too overwhelming for him.
And to top it off, I gave him a task to perform at the end of it. He needed to swing by the old house and put away the trash cans. Would he remember? Yes, he did. And that was even after he went on an errand of his own after the MBCC event (he had even asked if he could). And then I called him up in the afternoon to get him to take Rosie to pick up her baseball tickets for Sunday's game.
I'm so proud. I'm also feeling much better about him going to college. He just needs a bit of extra preparation and then he's able to do it.
So the last meeting was one I did with him- for the disability services office at his new school. But I did my best to let him talk and he even filled out the forms. And after that, he is MUCH more confident about going to college.