XX marks the spot

I knew I was in trouble when the results of my amnio came back with X chromosomes and no trace of Y.

I had three boys (and two stepsons at the time). I knew boys.

What is this pink, frilly thing of which you speak?

Over her 14 years, the Roo-girl has proven time and time again that girls. are. different.

My boys had teddy bears and dolls. They were turned into soldiers for battle.

My daughter had trucks. They were turned into Barbie dream cars.

My boys pulled "whatever" out of their drawers to wear in the morning.

My daughter created "outfits." With accessories. Tiara optional.

My boys' hair was wash-and-wear.

My daughter's hair ... oh. my. GAWD. Please do not talk to me about bangs and scrunchies and bows and blow dryers and french braids.

And tangles.

My boys were rough and tumble. And dirty.

My daughter was prissy and high maintenance. And clean.

Once, when she was in preschool, she was distraught over a little mud on her dresss. I told her that I could tell she was having fun at school when she got DIRTY.

That helped. A little.

As a child, I was a tomboy. I still am not a prissy, ultra-feminine woman. I prefer jeans and a t-shirt. I consider a little concealer and a quick swish with a mascara brush to be "wearing makeup." High heels just plain hurt my feet. Give me sneakers or flipflops any day.

So this womanchild in my house with the need for party dresses, heels, strapless bras, eyeliner  and foundation (FOUNDATION????) is a little foreign.

But what is not foreign is the mood swings. These I know. I don't understand them, but I know them.

So I knew that the only cure for huge, gulping sobs that wracked her over the weekend was to pull her into my lap, rub her back, pat her hair and whisper soothing nothings in her ear.

And what, you may ask, was she so devastated about?

Well.

Her loving mother and stepfather had finally upgraded her phone earlier that evening. It had a full keyboard, made her giggle with delight and rocked her world. It replaced an old flip phone (there's a story about that sorry state of affairs here) and gave her a new lease on her texting life.

But then ... for some weird, inexplicable, hormonal, teenage reason, the phone represented "CHANGE." And she flipped a biscuit.

And why?

"I dunno I dunno I dunno I dunno. I'm being so stupid, the phone is so awesome, but I can't even look at it. I dunno I dunno I dunno."

Uh. Right.

So in my calmest mommy voice, I reminded her that all phones can (again) be returned, no questions asked, for 30 days after purchase. And that she could always go back to her old phone.

And perhaps she should sleep on it and see how she feels in the morning.

Then I tucked her in ("I love you from the bottom of the ocean to the top of the sky and all the way around the world") and left her room, shaking my head.

And in the morning?

"I looked at my phone and thought, 'Wow! This is the coolest thing EVER!' " she burbled.

Teenage girls.

Can't live with 'em. Can't take 'em out and shoot 'em.

Comments

[Ilona]

I love the way you're so physical with her, and I love the way the Roo-girl still looks to her mom for the snuggles. Rebekah is now 15, and in the past few months I've pretty much stopped getting the sudden, unexpected hugs out of nowhere, and my hugs are accepted in a pretty cursory manner. As long as they're brief and not too... mushy.

Sigh...

I know you know to savour this. It's wonderful, isn't it? (The snugging. The moods swings? Not so much with the wonderfulness.)

[Nap Warden]

So not ready for teenagers;)

[Ramona]

It is so good to hear that someone else experiences these crazy highs and lows of parenting a teenage girl.

[Suzanne]

I'm with you-a tomboy, through and through. The chromosomes gave me two boys. I don't think I'm cut out for a girl!

[Anglophile Football Fanatic]

Have you tried to take her out and shoot? Just wondering.

[Burgh Baby]

That is why I'm shipping Alexis to you for her teen years. You've had practice. ;-)

[Eternal Sunshine]

I may or may not have had similar emotional episodes in my lifetime.

I admit nothing.

[kaytabug]

Look! It's mini Roo! She is too adorable!!!

I too am a tomboy too!! I read these and I am so thankful I do not have a girl, but there is still that lil bit in my other hand that longs to have a mother daughter relationship. Even if it is frilly and rife with hormonal ups and downs!
I teared up again. I thought you were going to cut that out!

[Daisy]

My daughter was a ruffle socks and buckle shoes type of girl. She's now a Converse AllStars and Old Navy Jeans type girl. But the hormonal ups and downs? She's there.

[Momisodes]

You really are the sweetest mom ever.

By the time my daughter is a teen, I'll start to fear for my husband's life. I'm moody (and acted the same way with my iTouch). Toss in a teen version of Babisodes?

He's toast.

[Janet]

Yeah, the Queen is coming to you in 9 years. We will not be leaving a forwarding address.

[VDog]

OMG, she is SOOOO cute!!

I wonder how fast she can text now...

[nikki]

So this is what I have to look forward to?!?! Oye veh.

[Joanna]

Oh she's cute!

Jeans and t-shirt gal myself. Maybe this is why I have boys. I'm now skeert spitless as I have twin teens. Thankfully we don't have those types of episodes.

[Pamela]

I'm scratching my head.. ha. Only a teenager.

[Robinella]

What a hoot.