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April 16, 2008

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I take huge satisfaction in the fact that my son (who turned 19 on the weekend) never leaves the house without giving me a hug. I've always been physically affectionate with the kids, and it seems to have paid off!!

It's a typical male-casual one-armed hug -- but it's a hug! And he initiates it! He has always done it, even when his friends are there. (Well, when we're in the house; outside the house, not quiiite so much. Depends on where we are.)

My youngest (14), often snuggles beside me on the couch in the evenings, and even at 22, her sister will do the same thing when I visit her home. I love it.

Yes, yes, yes!! My kids still hug me, and because of their height, I usually kiss the side or back of their necks.

I remember a great quote I heard before my sons were teenagers but one I always kept in mind. A mom of teens was saying that when she hugged her kids, she "never let go first." Because, as she knew then and I know now, kids sometimes need a much longer hug than we expect.

This was a gorgeous post! I hug my kids constantly, I can barely keep my hands off them, even now they are 12 and 14. I have to stand on a step to hug my son properly though, even though he gets a kick out of resting his chin on the top of my head!

Beautiful, Laura; and so true. I am a touchy-mom too, we hardly pass each other in the hallway at home, but I reach out and stroke an arm, tousle hair, or pull someone in for a hug.

I will never forget the time I reached for Snooze's hand in a grocery store parking lot, and he said, "Mom, I'm taller than you are now. They'll see me first." and it struck me, "Oh, no! Does this mean he doesn't need me?"

Now in parking lots, Snooze puts an arm around my shoulders- or still sometimes lets me take his hand. He says he needs to "protect his little mommy."

Both my sons will sometimes still come and sit in my lap - at 9 and 12. Sometimes even both at once, though that gets to be a bit much!

I'll have to remember the "don't let go first" - its a good idea.

"...appropriately close to other people" -- such a good phrase. Closeness is important, and so is distance.

I love my hugs from my teens even more than when they were little.

Because now sometimes the hugs can be about me.

When they were little, hugs and kisses were about them and their needs.

Now that they're older, they seem to know that sometimes Mom needs a hug and a kiss too.

"Skin Hunger" never heard that expression before but I think there's a lot to it.

Thanks Laura.

My sweet teenage boy still sits on my lap - sort of; he is bigger than me so it takes some juggling - and I never ever let a day go by without hugging them all - kids, and dog too. :)

Laura, I remember a NYT magazine back page essay from years ago where a new mom describes being so in love with her baby she just wanted to bite him. Sounds weird, doesn't it, but I do remember that feeling!!

It's so wonderfully encouraging to hear how you all love to cuddle your teenage darlings! You've exposed your tender Mom hearts.

Zayna--It's lovely to be acknowledged, isn't it?!

And I, too, will indulge in that not-letting-go first exercise!

My mom used to touch me all the time and I miss it now. My sisters and i all sleep together and fall asleep holding hands a lot or by rubbing a foot against a leg or something.

We just lost my niece and my daughter isn't taking it well. They were close to the same age my daughter is sixteen and her cousin fifteen.

I woke up last night and realized someone was there and I felt a weight on me. It was my daughter she had walked into my room and sort of curved over the top of me with her head on my shoulder.

I pulled her in bed with me and I rubbed her back while she cried.

I ended up sleeping with her for a couple of hours in her bed. She spooned me which she had never done before. It was an interesting sensation being spooned by my own daughter.

With her head pressed between my shoulder blades she finally slept, and I slipped out and got back into my own bed and spooned my husband.

Janice~

Thanks - I will. Off to hug mine right now.

So true, LB! My little one has always loved to be held, much to my delight. It's the thing about motherhood that I didn't know would make me so happy. Thanks.

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